After a long summer, wedding season, I found myself asking, “Why am I not getting married?” Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Oddly enough, I found myself looking for answer from an intuitive named Shawna.
Shawna, the Intuitive
I know, I know what you are all going to say. An intuitive? In a nutshell, Shawna’s method is channeling. Over the phone, she gave me a world of information without knowing anything about me. This was so different from the look into a crystal ball we are so familiar with. She started by telling me of the colors around me. She accurately described the color of my business card and my business website. Lucky guess, I suppose. Then she said I had a lot of sand around me. I live on an island. She mentioned my new career and the work I had been doing with meditation. She noted the successes and momentum that was building in these aspects of my life. All of which was great, but what about my love life and my endless walk down the aisle as a bridesmaid.
I’m Not Ready
She said it in very simple words: I wasn’t ready. Oddly enough, it was rather freeing to hear her say that. I felt pressured by myself, my life circumstances, and especially by others, to be married. Most recently, I clung firmly to a wonderful man. With him, I thought I would finally stop being the eternal bridesmaid. He was handsome, kind, and safe. Ah, there’s the word. It was safe to be with him because I trusted him. He was always busy because of his profession which made things nice for me. Neither of us could get too close even though we both played the game of tug-a-war. There was such a pull to be together because we had an incredible connection unlike one I had ever felt before.
Shawna said that I had just opened the door to what could be. I wouldn’t want to be with someone like him anyways, she said, because I’m evolving. I would be bored and unfulfilled. He would never be able to give me the type of depth I want from a relationship. He gave the perception that he could, but I would always be “hungry” for more. Boy did she nail that one! Even when we were at the height of our relationship, I always felt like there was something missing. Still, she assured me not to be too upset about that relationship because he was the perfect man for me at that time. Somehow, her words gave me the courage to let go of him. From that minute onward, I released him. It felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.
My friends would say things like, “Oh, he’s just not that into you.” “He should make more time for you.” Blah, blah blah. Really, it was never about him. It was always about me. I simply was not ready for more. I have so much to be grateful for. He taught me ME; he led me to the door of awakening. Thank you, thank you.
Change is necessary
Shawna said, “It’s ok to change. Change is necessary for more to come.” Then she gave me something that was wonderful. She said that I would find that connection and depth even deeper than I have ever felt before. When she said this, I felt such a wonderful sense of sureness, security, and knowing. He is coming, and he will be here when I am ready. In the meantime, I’m getting ready to be ready.
Shawna reminded me that I should dance more at weddings. It’s ok to be a bridesmaid. If I were getting married, I wouldn’t want my friends jealous or envious of me. I would want them to be happy for me. You may think I could have come to these conclusions on my own, but really, it doesn’t matter how to get to the finish line as long as we actually get there. Right? Yes, I would go back to Shawna because she gave me that release and peace I was seeking. I absolutely loved the experience. I loved knowing that he is waiting for me to be ready. He can wait a little bit longer. I’m busy enjoying…
Talk to Shawna:
Or check out her website: http://www.divineknowing.com/